Monday, February 8, 2010

I feel as if I am in a deep, dark pit all alone. In this deep pit I feel as if I am helpless, the circumstances around me are out of my control. It is a gnawing feeling that never subsides even as life goes on. I can turn in any direction and I see no light. I search for rest for my body, soul, and mind yet I can find none. My emotions have taken over me and I beg for some peace, just enough to get a few hours sleep at least. My mind is numb at times and goes down valleys it should not. I long for happy days again, for peaceful days, days of no more tears. Is this to much to ask?
I want to crawl out of this pit, please God pull me out, wipe my tears, hold me, comfort me. Help me to breathe. Don't let my heart be hardened. Help me to trust fully in you.

1 comment:

  1. Yes, dear lady, it's out of your control. You're dog-paddling, yet not sure in which direction to go. But you are not alone, Jesus is carrying you. And that 'numb' is instinctual protection that kicks in just so you can function at a basic capacity without coming completely unglued. It's that numb that leaves you unable to feel Christ carrying you. There will be days without tears, and your heart will not be lost. He will bring you to your new normal, and you really will be ok. But it's going to take time.

    Hugs, tissues, and prayers for you.

    (A Tylenol PM before bed every once in a while, or some Valerian when you wake up in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep may go a long way to helping that sleep deficit.)