Friday, October 22, 2010

On the way home from some errands this evening the kids and I were listening to Todd and Angie Smith as they spoke about their daughter Audrey who passed away. It came on right as we pulled in our driveway. Hannah asked if they could continue listening to it so I left the van run. Everyone was quiet and listening as Todd and Angie spoke about Audrey. I myself was crying as they spoke and I could hear the sniffles from the children. Some of their words were things we have felt or feel now. the pain is deep. I decided to turn the van off towards the end and we headed inside. Everyone was getting ready for bed and I noticied one of our boys was struggling. I took him aside and just hugged him. I told him I was sorry and I wish there was something I could do to take the pain from him. I reminded him that Hezekiah was safe and that someday we would see him again. I reminded him to have faith in God and trust he knows better than us. Then I started to think that Hezekiah was so blessed to have him as a brother and I lost it. The tears started flowing hard and I wept as I held my son. This boy loves his brother so much, we both stood there crying for some time. It is hard to see my children in pain, I wish I could take it from him but I cannot. I love that all my children love Hezekiah and miss him. I see how they each deal with the loss differently yet the same. How blessed I am to have these precious children.
Lord, heal my children and bring them some happiness in this area. I know you hear their specific daily prayer and Lord if it be your will answer it!

1 comment:

  1. I know exactly what you mean. It hurts me so bad to see my kids raw emotions & pain over missing Noah. But I have a feeling all of our children are going to possess something special in them for the rest of their lives because of Noah & Hezekiah. They will have an understanding & compassion that other children who haven't lost a sibling will never have. (did that make sense?)

    That radio program you listened to was part 2. The first part was on Thursday night. If you go to focus on the familys website, you can listen to both parts. Also, I have Angie Smiths book "I will Carry You" that someone gave me (I think I had told you about it). I'm almost done with it, it is SO good & I relate to it totally, if you want to borrow it, let me know. Love you