Thursday, June 10, 2010
Earlier in the week one morning after I had just handed Ruth her eggs for breakfast she looked up at me and said "Mommy I miss Hezekiah." I put the spatula down and walked over to her and looked into her eyes and told her I missed Hezekiah as well.
Yesterday morning Esther said to me "Mommy it's not fair that our baby died." I got down eye level with her and with tears forming in my eyes told her it wasn't fair but that we had to trust God. She shook her head yes and wrapped her arms around me and we equally enjoyed a moment.
Our precious Hezekiah is talked about everyday in our home by someone. That little boy is loved and missed so much. His 8 days on this Earth have touched us so profoundly. Even though we are going on with life we still deal with all that comes with not having Hezekiah. I think of him so often and think of all the things he would be doing now at 5 months old. I can imagine him being carried around by his older siblings and smiling with joy as they each make him giggle. I know Hezekiah is safe and that I could truly wish no better place for him to be.
Last Sunday we had Esther and Ruth baptized. We were waiting for Hezekiah to be born to get them all baptized together but obviously that could not happen. I dreaded standing up front without Hezekiah, I was so afraid I would emotionally loose it. But I didn't and I am thankful for that. We did sing the Psalms song and that was very hard. I did not sing and fought desperately to maintain my emotions. I don't think I will ever be able to hear that song without shedding tears and thinking of Hezekiah. Anyway a wonderful family from church invited us over to celebrate the baptisms after church and they included a cake for Hezekiah. Hezekiah was baptized shortly after he was born. I cannot even begin to tell you the depth of appreciation and love that we feel towards those that remember Hezekiah. We had a great day and it all ended to quickly as evening set in. What a blessing it was to be included in with this extended family. Thanks to you all!
We have been enjoying the beautiful days and one another. I am so thankful for my husband and children. What a blessing they are to me!